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June 2004 Table of Contents
Stories Behind the Songs
Dictation at a Traffic Signal
By Lindsay Terry
Song: Change My Heart, O God
Scripture: Psalm 51 "Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me...restore unto me the joy of Thy salvation; and uphold me with Thy free Spirit."
I have interviewed songwriters in scores of unusual places-wherever I can catch them still for a few minutes. I thought the interview with Gary Oliver, author of "Celebrate Jesus," took the prize for the most unusual place–in a booth at Luby's Cafeteria in Fort Worth, Texas, on a cell phone. But that one was topped when I caught up with Eddie Espinosa, also by way of his cell phone, while he strolled the aisles of a Target store in the Los Angeles area, shopping for a Mothers' Day present for his mother-in-law. If you have ever been in a Target store, then you can imagine the backgroud sounds on the tape of the interview.
Baudel and Guadalupe Espinosa had four sons, one of which was Eddie, born in Los Angeles in 1953. "There was always music around the house when I was growing up," Eddie told me. "We listened to a lot of different kinds of music. I grew up on everything from the Everly Brothers to The Lawrence Welk Show. My dad loved that show, especially Myron Floren and his accordion. Consequently, I started accordion lessons early on-about 1960. That lasted until about 1964, when the Beatles came on the scene with their guitars."
Eddie gave me the testimony of his conversion experience:
"At age fifteen, I was playing in a high school age band. The bass player and his family were Christians, and they invited me to their church, the Faith Assembly Church in Garden Grove, California. On my third visit, the pastor taught from the Scripture story of Jesus' encounter with the Samaritan woman at the well. After the Sunday school lesson, the pastor looked me square in the eye and asked, ‘Would you like to drink of the Living Water?' I said, ‘Yes,' and I was saved that very morning."
Now for the story behind Eddie's tremendous song, as he told it:
"The year was 1982. I had been a Christian since 1969, but I saw a lot of things in my life that needed to be discarded. The closer you get to the Lord, in all of his brightness, the better you can see the things in your life that need to be changed. But, I had slowly become very complacent. I remember thinking of the illustration about the frog that was placed in a pan of cold water and boiled to death, because the water was heated ever so gradually, causing him not to realize what was happening.
"I acknowledged my complacency, and at the same time I was like Paul, the apostle, who said, ‘O wretched man that I am! Who shall deliver me...' I prayed to the Lord, ‘The only way that I can follow you is for you to change my appetite, the things that draw me away. You must change my heart!'"
Shortly thereafter, I was in my car on the way to my work, feeling a desire to draw near to God, but with the wrestling was still going on in my heart. Suddenly, a melody and some words began to flood through my mind. As I stopped at a stop sign I reached for something to write on, and the first thing I found was a small piece of yellow paper, which, by the way I still have, and began to write as rapidly as I could. It was like taking dictation. I wrote the words on the paper, and kept the melody in my mind.
During those days I taught a weeknight home Bible study group, and during a communion time I shared my song with them. Our church home was the Vineyard Christian Fellowship in Anaheim, California, and someone from the group told the pastor that I had written a song that would be good to use during an altar call. The pastor asked me to play it for him, and afterwards asked if I would share it with the congregation, which numbered about 200 at that time. From that point on I began to get reports that my song was being taught in San Diego, the Los Angeles area, and in many other places. Sharing a song in that manner was a common occurrence in those days. Vineyard decided to put several of those songs, one of which was ‘Change My Heart, O God,' on an album and distribute them. That was the vehicle that God chose to launch my song to a vast audience."
Eddie has had many great experiences with his song, one of which was to lead thousands of men as they sang it at a Promise Keepers meeting in Texas Stadium in Dallas. I asked Eddie what was the most notable time that he ever heard of, when his song was a blessing to the hearts of people. He thought for a few moments and then excitedly told me this heartwarming story:
"I was in England directing the music for a conference. After one of the services I was standing on the floor level in front of the podium, when an elderly gentleman approached and asked, ‘Are you Eddie Espinosa?' I said, ‘Yes sir.' He hugged me, and he was weeping and said through his tears, ‘I just want you to know that I gave my heart to Jesus while singing your song. My wife had been wanting me to go to church for a long time. I finally consented to go, and as the words of your song came up on the overhead I read them and began to weep. As we sang the song, I joined in the singing with real meaning in my heart. I said, ‘God, I need you. Change me. That is the reason I am walking with the Lord today.' My wife Elsie and I began to weep–I was almost beside myself with joy."
The essence of Eddie's song is a prayer asking God to change us, making our hearts "true," and to mold us into His own image–"like You."
At the time of this interview, Eddie is a counselor at Orange High School in Orange, California. He also oversees a federally funded program for children. He has written scores of songs with thirty-eight of them being published. He was a pastor for a number of years, one church being the Iglesia La Vina, a Spanish speaking congregation. As his other duties will allow, Eddie and his wife Else often travel as a team, leading worship in conferences and special services. The Espinosa family are still active in the Vineyard Christian Fellowship. The have two children.
Reflection: As we have seen in this story, asking God to change us calls for a very definite and resolute decision–asking Him to change our hearts–not the red muscle pumping blood through our bodies, but the control center of our beings, the place where all of the decisions are made, causing us to say the words we say, think the thoughts we think, and do the things we do.
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